Oct 30, 2010

Income Tax for Elves

Manbearpig arrived at the Elven City, whose grandeur utterly astounded the humble Falconbearpig.  

From above, it seemed to be a glittering tumor upon the nature below.  While it was impressive in its size and seemingly endless amounts of magical goings-on within, it was also a perfect example of the blight upon the world as he saw it.  Such a structure was surely out of balance with nature, and was surely drawing much more than it was generating.  Still, he was glad it was here, as it likely meant help his friends desperately needed.

He landed and transformed in front of the city guards, who immediately confronted him.  "HALT!" they exclaimed, clearly having read and memorized the guard's handbook.  

Manbearpig's strength suddenly left him.  Now that he'd arrived, he realized just how tired he truly was.

"My... my friends need help.  They were attacked... attacked by giant bugs... ants riding... riding huge wasps... it was...  they killed so many... please, they may still be..."

The guards, being quite well practiced at this sort of thing, quickly helped him to his feet.  "Welcome to the Elven city sir.  Are you a citizen?"

Manbearpig paused, "A... a citizen?  No, I... I don't... I mean, do I need some kind of papers, or..."

The guards promptly dropped him where they'd found him.  "The Elves understand your plight sir, and are currently working to resolve the situation as promptly as possible.  Thank you for bringing this to our attention.  We thank you for your patience in this matter."

"Your... wait, what do you mean you're already... there was no elves..."

"Thank you for your patience sir.  Steps are already being taken to resolve the situation.  If you'd like to register a formal request for government aid, feel free to fill out the proper forms in city hall."

"But... but I can't get in to city hall, I... will you let me in?"

"Access to city hall to non-citizens is, unfortunately, at this time, not available.  If you'd like to take a number, we will contact you as soon as an opening becomes available."

"Wh... when will... when will that be!?" Manbearpig exclaimed, exasperated with the bureaucracy and seemingly "default" answers the guards were providing.

"That information is only available to citizens at this time.  We appreciate your patience in this matter." The guards continued.

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